||[Jun. 25th, 2004|11:57 am]
|||||i dont know why... but journey? send her my love...||]|
yikes. i have been having real problems w/ my nerves lately. i have had like... two freaky panicky attacks in one week and god my stomach is nothing but a acid pit. fucking a. i am going to an art gallery show tonight and hopefully things wont be too awkward. i have this strange tendency to feel extremely agorophobic when i am not drunk in public. where has all my self confidence gone??? probably flushed down the toilet from all the guys in my life that have fucked me over. seriously. its sickening and i dont know why i am this self-loathing, misanthropic, lethargic beast. i am sitting at my desk practically ripping all my fucking hair out from stress. i hate this place, this state and this state of mind.